PREVIOUS CHAPTER: Guilt, Grief, and Despair
N/A: The fourth chapter is finally here, and I’m sorry for the late update. Here’s the sweet, sour, and awkward reunion between Tokio and Saika after a year had passed. Enjoy for the meal, my friend.
Several minutes before his reunion with Saika…
“So… this is the place?”
Tokio arrived at a hospital far from his home city, nestled in a town situated within the mountains.
Unlike the hospitals found in the big city, this one was of modest size—not particularly large or small, just average for a hospital in a nearby country town. However, its interior felt more spacious, accommodating the steady flow of people who visited.
He stood in front of the building, staring up at its imposing structure. It was much larger than the usual hospitals in the big city, yet somehow distinctly different.
He held his smartphone tightly, using it to track the coordinates Sogabe had given him.
“It’s so far from my home…”, He sighed, catching his breath after walking halfway through town from the bus stop. It took him several minutes, nearly an hour, of searching before he finally found it.
“Geez, I’m tired,”
His body was drenched in sweat as he wiped his forehead repeatedly. This time, he refrained from sighing and instead concentrated on controlling his breath, hoping to feel better. Navigating through this country town for the first time was proving to be a real struggle for him.
A sudden buzzing came from his phone. When he checked the screen, it displayed an incoming call from Ryuji Sogabe.
He quickly tapped the phone and raised it to his ear.
“Hello?” Tokio answered the phone,
“How is it going kiddo? Did you find the place I sent you?” he could hear Sogabe’s voice on his phone.
His tired sighing made him try to exclaim his voice as he answered, “Sogabe-san, what… the… hell?”
“Huh, what do you mean ‘what’?” Sogabe was confused.
“I’ve been walking here through, searching all the coordinates you sent me, and I searched for an HOUR!!” The red-haired continued, “Dammit Sogabe-san, why do I have to come here alone?!!”
Tokio’s annoyance and upset raised his voice a little through a phone, “I thought, you said you were coming with me?”
“Oh, do not worry about that, I’m sure you came here alone and would make perfect dramatic and romantic scenes for you two lovebirds,” Sogabe said, playfully and sarcastic when it comes to his delusions and fantasy about Tokio and Saika.
“Are you serious?! Do you know how long has it been since we last met,” Tokio panicked and anxious, “Oh my gosh! I’m getting nervous right now, what if she looks at me with her cold eyes like before? What if she doesn’t try to look at me if I just appear straight in front of her? What if she started to dump me when we first met after a while,”
“Calm down kiddo, you’re thinking that too much,” Sogabe tried to calm him down,
“I… don’t want to hear that from you, old-middle age geezer,” Tokio started to feel disappointed and panicked all the same through his body language and expression.
“Wow, that hurt,” Sogabe replied from Tokio’s phone, but just as soon as that, he tried to encourage him, “Relax… I know Saika would love to see you again though, trust me, no hard feelings,”
“Yeah, right,” Tokio said.
“But as much as I am concerned about your anxiety, there’s something I might have told you first while you were going in there,” Sogabe shifted his playful and sarcastic tone. He went a little serious but still maintained his playful tone.
“Huh, what’s that supposed to mean?” Tokio confused,
“I’ll tell you, but first… how about buying some flowers for her,” Sogabe considered it.
“Flower, of course, but… what for?” Tokio asked,
“It’s common for guests to visit someone, like your close friends or relatives when they were being hospitalized, but you can also consider what you’re doing, as a part of a perfect reunion,” Sogabe explained.
“But… What do flowers have anything to do with a reunion anyway?” Red-haired continued to ask.
“*Sigh* you know what, just buy it and I’ll tell you once we get inside there,” Sogabe raised his voice in annoyance,
“You’re just desperate for this kind of reunion plan of yours, huh” Then Tokio continued, “But, is Saika hospitalized there?” he asked.
“Nope, someone else did, and you know who,” Sogabe answered.
Tokio was curious if Saika wasn’t hospitalized there, and someone else might be her relative, but, “Who?”
At present…
“Hello, good morning!” Tokio began to hand up the yellow roses toward Saika in front of the door,
Saika was continuously speechless at Tokio’s sudden arrival in front of her, “T-Tokio…”
“It’s… been a while… Saika-chan… hehe hehe,” Tokio grins, nervously, while his words are stiff due to his nervousness and anxiety.
“Eh… yeah… it’s been a while,” Saika said, surprised to see Tokio again after a year… while her word is still much stiff due to her being nervous.
As he extended his hand toward her, offering a flower, the atmosphere suddenly grew silent. The two of them stood face to face, his grin masking something deeper within Tokio.
“Wh-what is this situation? SO awkward!!” Tokio thought to himself, trembling and awkward, as sweat visibly beaded on his face, his discomfort intensifying, “Did she never have anything to say to me since we last met?”
He certainly continues to be awkward inside his mind, “Gah, think Tokio, think!!! It’s been a year, so it’s natural for me to get awkward like this! We should have had a normal conversation, but NOT LIKE THIS!!!” While he looking at Saika confusingly saw Tokio being so awkward toward her,
And his awkwardness and his messed up mind continued, that he could not control his anxiousness and nervousness in front of her, “C’mon, Tokio, think! think! Think!!! There must be something we need to talk about… C’mon, Tokio! Do it! DO IT!!”
Despite Saika’s initial confusion, a laugh accompanied by a smile graced her face. At that moment, Tokio’s nervousness melted away as he witnessed Saika’s laughter, prompting him to see beyond his self-consciousness for the first time and appreciate her genuine amusement at his folly.
“Baka-Tokio, you never changed, do you? hehehehe” Saika smiled while giggling, believing that Tokio is still an idiot she knew from a year ago.
“E-eh, Saika-chan?” Tokio was surprised, he was stunned and feeling bashful for the first time he saw Saika laughing so cutely.
Saika’s breathing slowed, and she graced him with a rare, generous smile, a small yet significant gesture that spoke volumes.
“How long are you going to just stay there with a look on your face? wanna come in?” Saika asked,
“O-oh right, I’m coming in,” Tokio said,
He stepped through the door at Saika’s invitation, entering the room quietly. His steps faltered as he caught sight of Jyotaro, still sound asleep in his bed.
“Saika-chan, is that?” Tokio asked,
“Jyotaro onii-chan, someone just came here to see you,”
Saika leaned in close to her brother’s bedside, her voice soft as she spoke to him, even in his coma. She continued, her words filled with tenderness and hope.
“You might already know him a long time ago, but I’m sure you knew him that well,”
She smiled at Jyotaro even though he couldn’t see it as his eyes were completely shut.
He might not see Tokio come to visit, nor could even see Saika beside him, but at least he could hear her voice far within his mind, even just a little.
For Tokio, the aftermath of his near-death experience in The World should have brought some semblance of relief, but instead, a heavy burden weighed on his heart. Despite surviving, he couldn’t shake the guilt that lingered within him. After all, he was the creator of AIKA, the mastermind behind the concept of Real Digitalization, with Geist carrying his legacy. The chaos of the past year, it all traced back to him.
Or that’s what he thought…
Several minutes earlier…
“Jyotaro Amagi… he’s… alive?!”
Balancing his phone against his ear, he stepped through the sliding doors of the hospital, his attention divided between the conversation with Sogabe and the task at hand. He approached the receptionist’s desk to inquire about Jyotaro’s hospital room.
“Yeah, according to one of my sources from CC Corp, Jyotaro’s body was registered in the hospital a few months ago. Although, where he was found and how he was able to go back to the real world is likely unknown,” Sogabe explained on the phone.
Tokio feeling disbelief, went to the lift nearby, “But, I saw Jyotaro’s dead with my own eyes, his body should have vanished after he turned into Outer Dependency Syndrome. He shouldn’t be able to return to the real world after all of his real body was destroyed, so how is that even possible?” He slowly walks as he focuses on listening to Sogabe’s explanation on the phone.
“That’s what I want to know, I couldn’t even deduce any theories of how and why is this even possible. It might be possible if someone can find him and pull him out from the Net World, and if it’s not, it would be impossible for him to be able to return to the Real World in such a state like that,” Sogabe explained.
“Do you think, there’s someone out there who knows where Jyotaro’s body is and can bring him back to the Real World, even in such a destroyed state or restored state?” The red-haired boy speculated about it.
“Can’t say for sure, I couldn’t find any clues behind that or try to prove the theories, but right now, Jyotaro is in a coma, just like you did back then, but his situation might be different from yours. The side effects from Outer Dependency Syndrome caused some great prices and consequences to his body… but that’s what I can tell you for now.” The man on the phone continued to explain Jyotaro’s situation.
“I see…”
He approached the elevator, his expression clouded with gloom and concern as he waited for the lift to arrive, eager to reach his destination floor. Thoughts of Saika weighed heavily on his mind, particularly considering her struggles with his brother’s coma. He could only imagine the anguish she must be experiencing, especially after the ordeal with AIKA.
At present…
Tokio didn’t move an inch as his eyes went directly to Jyotaro while holding the flowers in his hands, and then he started to ask, “Is your brother feeling okay right now?”
“He’s okay right now, at least. The doctor said there’s no progression whatsoever, but he’s in a little good condition right now. It might take time when he would be able to wake up,” Saika explained, while she pulled his blanket toward his shoulders to make him feel warm while asleep.
“I see, I hope he will wake up soon,” Tokio said,
“Yeah, I know,” Saika said while her eyes went to Jyotaro.
Tokio began putting the flowers on the left side of the vase which was filled with water. He put all of the flowers into a water vase so it could stay durable for a few days.
“So… by the way,” Saika said, as her eyes began to move directly toward Tokio,
“Hmm…” Tokio turned around and started to make eye contact with Saika,
“It’s… been a while hasn’t it? You changed since the last time I saw you” She blushed and felt despondent as she noticed Tokio’s appearance and shape began to change from what he was a year ago, “have you ever been eating well?” she started to look away, as she was shy about looking at him.
“Y-Yeah, I’m always good as usual, just one or two major changes in me… I guess.” Tokio said, awkwardly, but he smiled grinning as he shrugged his head.
“I see…” Saika smiled and relieved.
Awkward silence descended once more, enveloping them both in its uncomfortable embrace. Tokio and Saika exchanged glances, each realizing the awkwardness of the situation and choosing to remain silent, unsure of how to break the tension.
Saika and Tokio sighed at this awkward situation that they had gone into…
“This is awkward isn’t it, Tokio?”
“Believe me, Saika-chan, I feel the same as you,”
“How about we change the pace, wanna go… to the roof yard… with me?”
“S-Sure,”
As they left Jyotaro’s room, they opted to take the stairs to reach the rooftop instead of using the lift due to how it only takes them to a limited floor, taking the stairs allows them the opportunity to walk together and enjoy the journey to their destination.
As they walked, Saika noticed Tokio’s gaze fixed ahead, and memories of the morning’s torment flooded her mind. Guilt gnawed at her, knowing the past she shared with Tokio, yet unsure if he would accept her apology. With hesitation weighing on her words, she initiated a simple conversation.
“So… Tokio,” Saika called,
Tokio responded to her as he made eye contact again with her, “Y-yes, what is it, Saika-chan?”
Though she called out to him, uncertainty gnawed at her. She didn’t know where to begin or how to approach him. Nevertheless, she mustered the courage to take a small step forward, placing a sliver of faith in herself to start a conversation with him.
“How… have you been doing lately?” Saika asked & blushed.
“Eh-Excuse me,” Tokio confused, although he expecting her to say something like ‘Is that wrong if I’m asking?’ or any other kind of stuff, it was the first time that she remained silent without further ado. He might want to tell her to say something when he tries to answer, but when he looks into her eyes, it tells him that something sad is written within her, and things have gone rough for her as well.
He perhaps tried to reply to her, “W-well, to be honest, it’s complicated to talk about my life after the past year like this but to put it simply, it’s just the same old as always in my life…”
“I see,”
She had anticipated his response, expecting that Tokio might still be leading the same mundane life as before she had ever crossed paths with him.
“But,” Tokio said as if there were other words left to continue,
“Hmm,” Saika looking at his eyes again,
“Even though it’s the same old boring life like I always do, slowly and slowly it began to change. I started helping more people around me, I was always being asked about tips and guides about The World R:X, also some other stuff that might get me bored though,” Tokio explained his life after the past year, but then he continued, “But it was more fun than before,”
His beaming smile conveyed the depth of his happiness, signaling the profound impact of the changes in his life. They had brought him newfound joy and enlightenment, enriching his journey with valuable lessons along the way.
“… I really you doing okay”
Saika couldn’t help but feel a glimmer of joy and happiness as she saw Tokio smile gratefully. It warmed her heart to witness his life improving from what it once was. Yet, at the same time, his smile served as a painful reminder of her own guilt and the past where she felt responsible for robbing him of that very smile.
Avoiding his gaze, she turned away, feeling unworthy to meet his eyes. Shame and embarrassment weighed heavy on her heart for involving him and burdening him due to her actions.
As they reached the stairs, they ascended together, their conversation flowing effortlessly as they made their way to the rooftop yard.
“You know, my classmate is worried about you since you left,” Tokio explained,
“Really?” Saika asked,
“They’ve been talking about you all the time, and they’re still wondering if you’ve been okay right now, they miss you, Saika-chan,” Tokio explained, he knew that Saika would be happy to hear it about her classmates and even her fans.
But that was the opposite, “They don’t need to, neither do I, besides, I don’t have anything to do with them, anyway, so they better not do that too”
Tokio’s reaction was one of shock, his speechlessness stemming from her words. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing from her, and it wasn’t what he had hoped for. The cruelty of her words weighed heavily on him, as if she were trying to inflict pain upon herself with each syllable.
“S-Saika-chan,” Tokio worried,
“We’re here,” Saika said,
As they ascended to the final floor, Saika gestured towards the cluttered space, filled with items seemingly abandoned like relics in a forgotten attic. And there, standing before them, was the door they had been seeking.
“Alright,” Tokio opened the door and went through it… they had arrived at the rooftop floor.
The rooftop courtyard sprawled out expansively, devoid of any embellishments like the lush greenery or seating areas found in the city’s renowned hospitals. Instead, it presented a simple expanse of tiled flooring underfoot.
Enclosed by a fence to ensure safety, it provided a vantage point for observing the town’s scenery—a motive that had drawn Saika to ascend to the rooftop floor.
As Saika approached the edge where the fence bordered the rooftop, Tokio trailed behind her. However, she came to a sudden halt, prompting Tokio to do the same.
“Wow, this wind breeze is so nice up here,” Tokio said, as the wind came from the breeze around them.
He shifted his head in different directions, his left hand resting on his waist. Tokio continued, “It really surprised me there’s a big hospital inside the mountain, well, it might not be too big though.”
“There’s only a bus every two hours. A bus just passed the stop a while ago. Well, it took me an hour to find it, so it might be a little hard for me to find it. But I guess it was worth walking through after all.”
As Tokio spoke, Saika listened intently, her attention solely focused on him. However, she remained silent, unable to respond or even turn away. Instead, her gaze wandered towards the scenery and the sky, her eyes hollow and her expression vacant, reflecting the turmoil within her as she grappled with her own inner struggles.
Tokio continued,
“Ahahahah, well, this place seems nice and quiet,”
“I kinda like it, to be honest,”
“But, it feels calmer don’t you think? It’s almost like it’s been a long time I didn’t feel this much since I was a kid,”
“My brother might look very happy if I invited him to this town… he loves quiet places that aren’t even bothered by anyone…”
“… if he’s still alive, I’m sure he would be truly grateful for that,”
As he smiles, there’s a subtle shift in his tone and expression, a hint of sadness shadowing his eyes while he still try to smile. Though he tries to conceal it, a glimpse of the melancholy within him remains evident.
Although he had visited quiet and peaceful places before, this one seemed to stir up a particular sense of nostalgia within him, nudging at the edges of his memory. Suddenly, his eyes widened as he snapped back to reality, his mind racing to refocus on the present topic at hand.
Tokio waves his hands as he goes back being awkward once again, “L-look, what I’m trying to say is that I love this place as much as you do, ri-right Saika-chan?” He is aware that Saika might go mad at him if he tries talking nonsense at her.
But Saika didn’t glance his way, not even for a moment, deepening his concern for her well-being.
“But the thing is Saika-chan, I know it’s been a while and we didn’t even see each other like before, but I just want you to know…”
“I’m truly grateful to meet you again, Saika-chan.”
His grin widened into a symbol of his joy and gratitude for the twist of fate that reunited him with Saika. His genuine expressions and heartfelt happiness warmed Saika’s heart as she listened.
The one who had been manipulated by her, burdened with her troubles, and entrusted with her responsibilities, was enough to make him suffer from Saika’s misdeeds. Her actions cost Tokio dearly, his life forever altered by her choices.
And yet, Tokio smiled as if nothing had transpired, expressing his genuine gratitude for the opportunity to meet her once more.
But… for Saika…
“Why are you being so grateful about it?”
it was merely unacceptable.
“H-huh?”
Tokio was stunned by the words that fell from her lips, their hollowness cutting through the air like a sharp blade. They seemed designed to pierce straight to the heart, and for Tokio, they hit harder than he could have imagined.
“Aren’t you going to say something, like blaming me, instead of saying how grateful you are even seeing me again?” Saika felt disappointed.
“S-Saika, that’s not what I com-” Tokio said,
But Saika cut his word,
“Tell me…”
“S-Saika-chan,”
“Tell me, how did you even find me, Tokio?”
As Saika shifted her body and locked eyes with Tokio, he was taken aback by the sight before him. Her gaze held an overwhelming mix of depression, sadness, pain, and anguish, her expression a canvas of turmoil. Tokio found himself speechless, witnessing the depth of sorrow etched on Saika’s face. It was as if she had been haunted by countless nightmares for a year, her life weighed down by an unbearable sadness.
From that moment, Tokio started to piece together the significance of what Sogabe had mentioned before his encounter with Saika.
Several minutes earlier…
“Saika-chan? Is something wrong with her?”
“You said that you were concerned about her?”
“That’s the first time hearing that from you, Sogabe-san?”
As the elevator ascended, Tokio maintained his conversation with Sogabe over the phone. A moment of silence ensued, leaving Tokio puzzled. Then, Sogabe’s voice turned serious as he began to relay the crucial details of what had transpired.
“A year ago… before her disappearance, she came to the hospital where you were being hospitalized.”
“When I saw the look on her face for the last time, she was different from who she was back when you and Saika were in The World, it’s almost like her expression held no bright within her,”
The red-haired boy was confused by his explanation, “You mean?”
Sogabe continued, “All I say is that her mental state seems pretty messed up,”
“Messed up,” Tokio was surprised with her condition, as Sogabe continued explaining things from his phone.
“Well, can’t you even imagine how she is grieving for the loss of her brother? I heard that she lived in a poor environment, especially with all the troubles she went through during childhood. But since it’s about Jyotaro, she went through so much struggle by involving you in her mess so she could save him.”
“Only to realize that she had brought her mess that led you to fall into a coma. Of course with all the loss and grief she got, it was very much harder to imagine how she had gone through.”
Tokio asked, “But Jyotaro is alive right, so Saika should be alright now,”
“You forgot that AIKA’s death also became the source of her grieves too,” Sogabe said,
He came to the realization that the loss of AIKA had inflicted profound anguish and grief upon her, far more than he had initially comprehended. He could empathize with her pain, understanding the depths of sorrow that came with losing someone dear. And he suspected that it wasn’t just AIKA she mourned, but perhaps other losses he wasn’t aware of.
With his phone still in hand, Tokio reached the seventh floor and stepped out of the elevator. Determinedly, he made his way down the hallway toward Jyotaro’s room.
“So… what should I do now, Sogabe-san?” Tokio asked for advice,
“*Sigh* it might be the best for you to face her with your own eyes,” Sogabe said, and he continued, “But I must warn you something,”
“What is it?” Tokio asked,
“According to the doctor that Saika had made an appointment with, her mental state is simply getting worse right now, she might gonna do something that is beyond what we think about, but it might the best to at least make her open up to you, and resolve something for her” Sogabe explained the situation and the best way to avoid that, but, “If you don’t”
“If I don’t?” Tokio asked.
With only one answer Sogabe can speak up even though he hesitated to say it in words.
“Today… might be the last day you can see her,”
TO BE CONTINUED
NEXT CHAPTER: Please, Forget About Me.
N/A: What a sweet and sour reunion between Tokio and Saika. This makes me feel even more bad for her and her condition she just in.
It’s truly a wonderful moment that Saika wasn’t as much tsundere as before, but right now she’s in a state where mental states have taken a toll, along with the guilt, grief, and despair that have driven her into being ignorant and self-denied that everyone worried about him.
But at least Saika is happy, deep inside her heart for what Tokio’s doing now. It sounds different interaction compared to them back then during the event of .hack//Link, communication between two of them sometimes got rocky, and Saika was the one who started that. But here, their communication seems pretty good, aside from the suffering that she had gone through.
The next chapter will be the moment, the moment how she really lose it… and some major Tokio’s character development.
Until next time…
P.S: Sogabe seems pretty smart to predict Saika’s move, but that’s because he knew what condition that Saika had gone through, especially he aware the truth behind Immortal Dusk’s news about 200 people’s death, that no one could aware of. I think that’s the source of her suffering from the guilt she had gone through.
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